Seven Things to Know Before Having Kids

Esther and I BC - Before Cristian
Esther and I BC – Before Cristian

Parenthood is a life-changing experience, I love being a Dad.  That said any parent, or more specifically this parent is letting you know your life is going to change because you WILL make sacrifices along the way.  I knew this coming in—at least I thought I did.

If you are thinking about starting a family this is a must read—it will give you some insight on what lies ahead.

Pregnancy – You want a sneak peek on parenthood, pregnancy is a good place to start. There’s weight gain, sleepless nights and moodiness—and that was just me.  Prepare for a rollercoaster ride of Lamaze Classes, baby registries, and unsolicited advice from all sides.  I don’t know what was rougher dealing with my better half’s hormones or agreeing on the baby’s name.  Don’t worry about the sleep deprivation—you’ll catch up once the baby’s born.

What the first week feels like.
What the first week feels like.

New Baby/Clueless Parents – The first days are a blur of, baby bottles, dirty diapers, and caffeine (mine not the baby’s).  Bonus points if you survive without getting peed on.  After a week of this your friends and family will want to see the baby.  Hopefully they will do more than post selfies with your child on Instagram.  Helpful hint, don’t be shy when someone asks, “What can I bring.”  It’s a limited-time offer so forget the chicken nuggets and go for the big ticket items like surf and turf.

The Baby Tour – Once the baby’s older you’ll be required to take him on tour.  This is done for the relatives who couldn’t make it to your home or were afraid of the cranky old man, otherwise known as me.  Packing the car with the baby bag, separate clothes bag, laundry bag, (all stuffed with individually packed zip lock bags), stroller, playpen, and hopefully the baby is time consuming.  I’m an experienced logistics guy who coordinated corporate events in every major convention center and hotel in North America, it was less stressful than loading the car for a twitchy mommy wanting to show off her pride and joy.

Air Travel – Is the Baby Tour on steroids.  Imagine packing everything listed above in addition to your own luggage and spending at least three hours in a cramped airline seat with a squirming toddler in your lap.  Sure the baby flies free but would it hurt the airlines to throw in a few free drinks?  When things get rough go to the parents’ secret weapon–Benadryl.  Travelling with a baby makes you long for the days when you travelled with just one backpack.

Before, the toys are neatly stacked while the baby sleeps.
Before, the toys are neatly stacked while the baby sleeps.

House Looks Like a Natural Disaster – Do you like an orderly home?  Does your bathroom have cute little soaps and towels only guests are allowed to use? Does your living room come straight from the pages of Better Homes and Gardens?  Toddlers change that in a hurry.  Once they start walking you’re immaculate home will look like the Jersey Shore after Hurricane Sandy.  If you’re lucky you may qualify for a FEMA reimbursement.

After - The baby wakes up. Imagine what the rest of the house looks like.
After – The baby wakes up. Imagine what the rest of the house looks like.

Sleeping the Night – Scratch this one off the list for a few years, there’s no rhyme or reason to a baby’s sleep patterns, don’t try to understand it, just manage it–like a pregnant woman’s hormonal outbursts.  Haven’t you been reading this blog?  If you’re lucky the baby only wakes up once a night.  Of course teething can change that quickly.  Don’t worry, you’ll learn to function on four-hours sleep.

Lazy Sunday Mornings – Sunday mornings used to be about selfish pleasures, a morning run, an IHOP breakfast or lying in bed with Esther reading the Sunday paper.  A baby changes this and those simple pleasures become luxuries.  Sunday mornings are now about watching PBS Kids and chasing the baby around the living room.

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23 thoughts on “Seven Things to Know Before Having Kids

    • March 13, 2016 at 1:06 pm
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      I love my son and wouldn’t trade him for anything, but life after having children is never the same.

      Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 12:26 pm
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    Being a father is a feeling that elates me just by thinking about it! Congrats!!!

    Reply
    • March 13, 2016 at 1:07 pm
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      I love being a Dad, but we do make sacrifices. How many things in my post were you able to relate to?

      Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 1:50 pm
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    Ofcourse kids are the greatest happiness in the world. And I don’t want my life to be same when I have one.

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    • March 13, 2016 at 2:00 pm
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      Of course they are. I love my son but just note once you have a child, you’ve reached the point of no return. I’m not saying I want to go back but there are things I miss.

      Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 3:42 pm
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    Nice post! Even though you might miss out on certain things that you used to be able to do, the blessing of seeing your kid grow up makes up for it 🙂

    Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 4:10 pm
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    Sorry to hear about the lack of sleep but you are right it truly is part of the package. It is always refreshing to see parenting told from the viewpoint of the dad!

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    • March 13, 2016 at 5:33 pm
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      Sleep deprivation comes with the territory. Keep checking back for a view from the other side of the child.

      Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 4:14 pm
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    Thank you for the tips! I don’t have children yet so this article was very insightful 🙂

    Reply
  • March 13, 2016 at 6:48 pm
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    Thank you for your insightful tips! Congrats on becoming a proud dad!

    Reply
  • March 14, 2016 at 8:55 am
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    I’m ashamed to admit it but my house looks like a disaster everyday no matter how many times I clean it. It’s frustrating!

    Reply
    • March 14, 2016 at 9:29 am
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      It’s all part of it. My mother-in-law kept a home that looked like a museum and thought my wife to maintain the same type of home. Babies are the great equalizer.

      Reply
  • March 14, 2016 at 2:29 pm
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    Yes, a baby changes everything. When I had my first baby, my life had a direction and purpose. I had a great time reading your post. 😀

    Reply
    • March 14, 2016 at 3:06 pm
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      You are correct, it’s amazing the how your life changes when you have a baby. My wife and I still look at him amazed he’s ours.

      Reply
  • March 15, 2016 at 8:14 am
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    I love this post. It made me laugh. I don’t think I’m quite ready for all that yet!

    Ami xxx

    Reply
    • March 15, 2016 at 8:19 am
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      I’m glad I was able to make you laugh. Your life changes after having a baby, it’s a good thing BUT I wanted to show the full picture.

      Reply
  • March 24, 2016 at 10:18 am
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    This is such a funny post mde my day but congrats cant wait to experience it for myself one day

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    • March 24, 2016 at 10:45 am
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      Enjoy your life as it is now, and cherish those childless moments. Things change upon becoming a parent, it’s not a bad thing but they change. Baby Whisperers are a vital part of easing the transition.

      Reply
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